Porta Pansy - 2011/01/24

Im stuck in the bathroom smelling like shit
Crying my pretty eyes out because Im a twit
I got myself into this room with no way out
Nobody explained what a door knob was about
The walls are closing in on poor little me
I was left with no choice WHY CANT YOU SEE

Some say I flushed my pride down that john
When I started screaming like Kirk for Khan
And banging my fists on the wall in a fury
If only I had known help was not in a hurry
So when it arrived it asked dude whats up
What is the deal did your hemorrhoid erupt

I begged and I pleaded there was no escape
It replied use the doorknob you idiot ape
While I began to weep it just disappeared
My imprisonment was real just as I feared
Then suddenly in a flash I opened my hand
Grabbed cold brass and found a weird land

I expected a celebration upon my arrival
Yet I found myself fighting for survival
Jeers of the fools tracked my every move
Though soon the opposition was too great
And I retreated home to self flagellate

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