Deadbeat 101 - 2011/10/14

Have you ever wondered how to be a deadbeat? If yes I know somebody you ought to meet. He solicits your services and then dangles payment leaving you to become his next angry claimant. Like a stranger luring children with candy, he believes this situation is fine and dandy.

I sent the man a bill for services rendered. I received the typical result such efforts engendered. He ignored the bill knowing what would ensue, once thirty days had passed and it became past due. When the deadline came and absconded it was then that I again corresponded.

His response was fiery and full of hurt. He did not care for the leverage I was threatening to exert. He claimed that stopping all work was hurting everybody involved. You can imagine how the conversation further devolved. Needless to say he promised to pay the following week. Never ever trust the words of a known sneak.

The following week came by, waved hello and then departed. The lack of a check brought us to a place uncharted. I sent a letter which indicated my intention to sever, all ties with the deadbeat now and forever. A few days passed and there was absolutely no reply. Only after that did things go even more awry.

I received a note indicating my check was just sent overnight along with a load of crap explaining the massive oversight. The deadbeat also decided that he wanted me on a retainer. So there would be a second check in the container. Both checks arrived and to my great surprise, he became an even bigger douche bag in my eyes.

The first check was fine and everything checked out. The next one however is what this composition is about. You see it wasn't enough to just send the check along for future work.  No this cheap skate moron decided to be a massive jerk. On the stub in big sloppy script, was the note he left over which I flipped.

The implication was that I would take the money and run. As if it was my lack of ethics over which this disagreement had begun. So that is why I decided to put that check to great use. You see, I might have used it to wipe my smelly caboose. It goes without saying that it shall be returned.  For that is the wrath of the vendor the deadbeat has spurned.

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